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Chris knew it could have been worse. His roommate could have been messier, louder, more rude. The kinds of things his friends all complained about. Instead, he complained about Tyler. Tyler, who walked around in his underwear with the window wide open so everyone could see. Tyler, who stared at him while he got dressed and made comments. Who kicked Chris out every week to have sex with a new guy or girl from one of his classes.

His roommate just had to be Tyler, who jerked himself off every night while they were both in the dorm. It started pretty early, just after orientation week. The instant the lights went out, there was a certain shifting of sheets and the swallowing of urgent breath. Sometimes Chris would roll over, crack open an eye to watch Tyler’s face lit up by the porn on his phone screen. Sometimes he’d even reach cautiously under his own sheets, gripping his cock beneath his underwear and giving it a tentative stroke, but he could never really commit. He was always too cautious.

Most of the time he just laid there in silence, desperately hard. He watched Tyler let out a few beautiful little gasps, cumming onto himself and wiping it casually onto his sheets. Adding one more stain to the sea of them. Though he pretended to be asleep, Chris always saw Tyler falling asleep in his own filth like nothing had happened before Chris could even convince his body to rest.

He tried talking to his friends about it.

“Ew, and you haven’t told him to stop?” Kayla said when he told her. One of Chris’s closest acquaintances, Kayla had maneuvered her way out of two roommates since starting at the school.

“No. I don’t know,” Chris shifted in his dining hall seat. He couldn’t stop glancing up at Tyler, who sat across the dining hall laughing with a group of friends. He hated the shock of pleasure that ripped through his body when Tyler laughed. “It just feels weird,” he continued, “I wouldn’t know how to bring it up.”

“Well, if you can’t bring it up to him you can always bring it up to housing.” Chris nodded along with what Kayla was saying, but didn’t really listen. Instead, he watched Tyler’s ass as he stood up from his table. He imagined grabbing it, pressed crotch to crotch with Tyler, both pulling each other closer, faster. Chris caught his breath in his throat when Tyler turned and met his eyes with a cocky smirk. He felt like he had been caught doing something horrible, and tried to play it off like he had meant to be looking at something else.

“Oh my god,” Kayla broke Chris out of his fantasies, “Is he over there? You really have a little sexy roommate thing going on, huh?” Kayla laughed.

“Shut up. It’s embarrassing.” Chris was mortified by the whole situation, and spent the rest of his dinner with a running stream of embarrassing thoughts about Tyler in the back of his mind.

When Chris walked back to his dorm building that evening he glanced up and, sure enough, there was Tyler. Fully illuminated in the open window, his cock and balls visibly cradled in his grey cotton briefs. Tyler glanced out the window too, and waved down at Chris with a grin. Chris was mesmerized by his body as Tyler approached the window. Chris watched him press a hand against a mirror. Slowly, Tyler pushed the band of his underwear down, showing his hip bones, then his pubic hair, then just the edge of his cock before Chris’s head snapped forward. Did he really? Chris couldn’t look. He just couldn’t. With his eyes turned down, Chris walked quickly into the building and hoped no one else had seen Tyler’s display. Or, even worse, he had connected himself to the event. Chris shook off his embarrassment and twisted the doorknob to enter his room.

“You didn’t like my little show?” Tyler said with a snort, pulling on a pair of overly-tight jeans.

“Not really,” Chris responded, though the flutter in his abdomen said otherwise. He threw his bag beside his bed and glanced over a few times at Tyler, who was currently cycling through a series of different tank tops revealing his narrow, muscled shoulders.

“Are you going to Deckard?” Of course Tyler was going to some party. Which meant Chris would probably be kicked out again so his roommate could have a random drunk hookup.

“No. Don’t you have an 8am tomorrow?”

“Yeah, but Rebecca’s friends are hosting thirsty Thursday so I can get jungle juice for free. Plus, I think James is gonna be there.” Chris remembered James. He was probably the closest thing their small school had to an athlete, with a broad body and the competitive temperament to match. Chris could have sworn he was straight, until he noticed him pressing Tyler up against a wall and shoving his tongue down his throat.

“How do I look?” Tyler asked, after Chris had spent a good moment pretending to work on a philosophy essay. Chris stared at his roommate, who struck several elaborate and overly-sensual poses. He couldn’t stifle a small laugh at Tyler’s behavior, but appreciated the chance to take in his body. Those long legs, with pants that hugged his gaziantep escort muscular thighs. The collarbone, tan skin, and sharp bones of the face. Chris figured his roommate was probably philipino or something, but had never asked. It felt rude to ask. It felt rude to say any number of the things he wanted to say to Tyler, so Chris swallowed his pride and said simply,

“Good.” Tyler held his gaze with a silent intensity, then broke into a smile and responded

“Thanks, have fun studying,” as he pushed his way out of the room.

Chris was thankful for any moment he got in the room alone. Unlike his roommate, Chris needed to be alone when he masturbated, and every time Tyler went to a party he knew he could really settle in. He straightened up his bed and moved to pull down the blinds on his window. Outside, he could see Tyler walking across the lawn. He walked his roommate walk until, halfway across the lawn, Tyler stopped, turned around, and met Chris’s eyes with a smile. Chris looked on in an anxious silence as Tyler lifted up his shirt, revealing his stomach and the bar piercing in one nipple. He saw Tyler’s body all the time, but these public displays still made Chris nervous. So he closed the blind and got back to the business at hand.

When Chris masturbated, he liked to make a big show of it. He wasn’t one for quickies. Instad, he locked the door, spread out on his freshly made bed, and pulled out his laptop. Chris really scoured the porn website before settling on something to watch, with a title like “Caught barebacking in public bathroom.” It was one of those videos Chris knew would make him feel guilty later, but he still couldn’t resist watching it. Sure enough, there were two men onscreen pounding their bodies together, captured from a strange angle as if someone was recording over the top of a bathroom stall. Chris tugged his pants off, letting the moans and pants emanating from his laptop wash over him. He spat in his hand and wrapped it around his dick. With slow, deliberate strokes, Chris brought himself to hardness. He watched the man onscreen arch back against the dick in his ass, letting out some cry like “Yeah daddy, please cum in my ass.” Chris picked up his pace, clenching one fist around his dick and the other on his bedsheets. Suddenly, the cameraman made a noise and the aforementioned “daddy” turned around to face the camera. Chris stopped breathing. He jerked his cock rapidly. “What the fuck?” the man onscreen said, before the camera was shut off and the video ended all too soon.

Chris still hadn’t cum yet. Dick in hand, he glanced around the room, and his eyes fell on Tyler’s bed. He had left it unmade, and a faded white stain was visible on the dark-colored sheets. Slowly, Chris approached the bed. He let himself lean towards the sheets, nose brushing the stain, and inhaled. It smelled like sweat and stale cum. Chris’s head swam. After a furtive glance to the door, Chris hoisted himself onto the bed. He took his shirt off and slid under the sheets. He could feel the crust of dried cum on his back. It was filthy, but he couldn’t get enough of it. Chris pulled the sheet over his head and breathed in deeply. He stroked his cock fast, imagining Tyler doing the same thing every night. He rubbed his dick into Tyler’s sheets. He imagined those little grunts Tyler let slip out sometimes, imagined those groans coming out unrestricted. He imagined wrapping his lips around Tyler’s cock, looking up to see him with that stupid grin on his face. He hated Tyler. He hated him, and stroked faster, rubbing his body into the dirty sheets until he came.

Chris let himself lie back in the bed. He steadied his breathing, and pressed Tyler’s sheets into the cum splattering his torso. With slow deliberate movements, Chris wiped himself clean, enjoying the way his cum stood out against the dark-colored sheets. Tyler wouldn’t notice a few more stains, he told himself. Besides, that’s what he deserved for masturbating while Chris was awake in the room. Or for stripping in front of the window, lifting up his shirt, making Chris feel so fucking embarrassed. Chris jumped down from the bed and pulled the sheets back up to hide his cum. He took a shower, and let himself drift into the first peaceful slumber in a long time.

That is, until later the same night. Through the haze of sleep, there was the messy opening of a door, and whispers. Chris rolled onto his side. There was heavy breathing, some indistinguishable wet noise like kissing. “Is your roommate here?” Chris was only half-awake, but he recognized his roommates voice in response “Shh don’t worry. He’s a heavy sleeper.” Chris was not a heavy sleeper. He resisted the urge to open his eyes when he heard the jangling of a belt coming undone, the sound of clothes hitting the floor. Chris heard that telltale squeak of Tyler’s bed as his roommate and the other man climbed into bed. “Do you have lube?” “Yeah, it’s in my top drawer.” Chris wanted to pop out of existence. He heard a bottle opening, and Tyler’s quiet grunts: “Oh, fuck yeah.” Chris wished he wasn’t alive. He wished he could escape.

He wished he wasn’t getting hard.

Chris heard more creaking, the crinkling of a condom wrapper, more wet kissing noises. He shifted in bed subconsciously, rubbing his dick against the sheets. There was a moment of silence and then Tyler’s voice again. “Ah, ah” quiet exclamations like he was in pain. Now the creaking really started up in earnest, and the moaning, and Chris was struggling to keep up the facade of being asleep. Trying to keep his breathing even, Chris opened his eyes. In the dim light from the window, he saw Tyler on his back and the muscled figure of James pushing furiously into him. Tyler’s mouth was open, grunts and expletives pouring out with every thrust. Chris watched Tyler pull his lover’s head down to the side of his neck, watched him breathe sharply when James sucked bruises into his skin. Tyler’s head was turned, so Chris could see the sweat glistening in his furrowed brow.

And then Tyler’s eyes were open.

Chris held his breath. Tyler’s eyes were locked on his own. James began thrusting furiously into Tyler again. A little half-smile crept across Tyler’s face as he let out a moan, pushing up against James’ dick. Chris knew he should look away, but he couldn’t stop. Tyler and James changed positions. Now on his hands and knees, Tyler alternated between meeting Chris’s gaze and letting his eyes roll back with pleasure. Chris wrapped a hand around his cock and slowly began stroking himself to the sight of his roommate being fucked. He marveled at his roommate’s slender, athletic body. Tyler must have noticed him jerking off, because he shot him a smile, then moaned loud. Chris was sure the whole hall could hear him, but he couldn’t stop. He kept masturbating through the embarrassment. James, oblivious to the whole roommate interaction, pulled Tyler’s hair and smacked his ass and called him a “thirsty faggot.” He pinched and tugged at Tyler’s nipple piercings, and Chris shuddered at the little gasps Tyler was letting out.

“Don’t stop,” Tyler whined, and James pulled out momentarily just to flip him onto his back and thrust in forcefully. It got harder, deeper, more intense. Tyler opened his mouth and James spat inside without missing a beat. Chris couldn’t catch his breath. He had seen his roommate masturbating but this-

“Take it, you filthy little bitch.”

This was a lot. Chris watched, masturbating furiously, as James’ hands went to his roommate’s throat. He had basketball hands, massive and powerful around Tyler’s neck. Chris watched his roommates eyes widen, his mouth open in a silent gasp, his skin beginning to redden. Finally, his roommate was quiet. James thrusted harder. Chris jerked his cock faster. Tyler gurgled away in aroused silence, bringing his own hand to wrap around his dick. Chris saw a vein begin to bulge on Tyler’s head, his eyes watering, before James released his throat. The air rushed back into Tyler’s lungs with a wet and audible gasp, his bony chest heaving. A breathy “fuck” leaked out of his mouth, and all the sudden Chris was coming. He was splattering his chest, his bedsheets, his hand, all because of his roommate’s pathetic little voice.

Tyler acknowledged Chris’s orgasm with a smile, and wrapped his legs around James to pull him in deeper. The two young men thrusted against each other at a crazed speed until, just as suddenly, they were done. James stopped, shuddering inside of Tyler. Tyler stroked himself a few more times, and then came over James’s chest and his own. They panted, and kissed, and Chris quickly shut his eyes to look like he had been asleep. He heard the condom being taken off and thrown away. Footsteps. The rustling of clothes.

“Wow, he really is a heavy sleeper,” James said, a little closer to Chris’s body than he would have liked.

“Yeah, I know.” Then the door was coming unlocked and Tyler was kissing James again, quickly, “Alright. Have a good one.” The door closed with a slam, and then silence.

Chris didn’t see his roommate the next morning. Somehow, he always managed to stay up all night and still make it to his 8am class. At lunch, he saw Tyler with a group of friends but couldn’t manage to catch his eye. He couldn’t stop thinking about the past night. He thought about Tyler’s body rubbing into the cum he had left on his sheets, completely unaware. He thought about that drunken smugness on Tyler’s face when he saw that Chris was watching. He thought about all of it, over and over again, without earning so much as a glance from Tyler.

It was a Friday, so naturally everyone was going to some party. Kayla and her friends had been pregaming in her room, so Chris joined them after dropping his bags off in a roommate-less dorm. They were playing some drinking game Chris couldn’t really follow but made a solid attempt at keeping up with. A few too many plastic cups half full of beer later, and everyone was too drunk to worry about the rules anyway. “So you and Tyler,” Kayla asked Chris at one point in the night, and he bristled. Even this drunk, he couldn’t control his response to the name.

“Yeah, what about us?” he responded sharply. He knew he was making people tense, but Kayla was never one to be frightened away from gossip.

“Are you guys gonna fuck or what?” Chris picked up the beer cans scattered across the floor, shaking each one to see if there was any left. He found a promisingly heavy one, and downed it. He said something like:

“I don’t know. Maybe.” But he didn’t say “I hope so” or “I came all over his bed.” He was too embarrassed to say any of that.

The party was nothing unexpected. The same thumping trap music, the same beer-sticky bodies, the same fights and makeout sessions. It was all the same as usual, except for Tyler. He was always a big party-goer but tonight he seemed different. Shirtless, dancing wildly, glancing around with this crazed look in his eyes like an animal in a cage. Chris saw him there with the light glinting off of his pierced nipple and stared for a moment, before he was caught in the act.

Tyler’s eyes locked onto his and narrowed.

Chris didn’t know what to do. He tried to dance, at least move his shoulders and hips a little, but he knew it didn’t look good. Nothing he was doing looked good. Tyler kept watching, moving closer to him in some miraculous, rhythmic way until they were right in front of each other. Tyler’s hand fell on Chris’s hip, and they swayed to the music together, always moving closer. Before Chris had time to think about it, they were grinding on each other, and Tyler was pulling up the hem of his shirt. “Oh, wait,” Chris tried to protest, but Tyler quieted him instantly.

“It’s just a shirt.” And then his shirt was off. And then Tyler was backing him against a wall. And then they were kissing.

It wasn’t like any kiss Chris had had before. There was a certain roughness to it, in the way Tyler pinned his wrists to the wall and grabbed his ass and clung to the side of his neck. And there was the embarrassment. Embarrassment at being seen shirtless. Embarrassment at making out with his roommate. Extreme embarrassment when Tyler pinched his nipple and Chris let out a gasp against his lips. He felt his head pressing back against the wall, Tyler gripping his hips to grind against him.

“I saw you watching us last night,” Tyler groaned into his roommate’s ear. Chris stared dimly out at the party as Tyler continued, pressing kisses into his neck in between words, “And I noticed the little surprise you left in my bed.” Chris squirmed when his roommate’s teeth dug into his collarbone, sending a deep ache through his body. Tyler’s hands were everywhere, on his neck, and his ass, pulling their bodies together. “We all know you want to fuck me,” Tyler said, grinding against Chris’s hard dick to articulate his point.

“Yeah,” was all Chris could get out. He was too drunk and too turned on to conjure up the words.

“So do it then.” Tyler left another kiss on Chris’s neck.

“Let’s go back to the room.”

Tyler lead Chris back to the room with his roommate’s hand firmly gripped in his own. They were going so fast, bounding over the damp lawn and up the residential hall stairs. Tyler pressed his lips against Chris’s, slamming him back against the door, and then pushing him inside. “Take your pants off,” Tyler commanded, and Chris was quick to comply. They were all over each other like wild dogs, each grabbing at the other’s body, only breaking away to retrieve lube and a condom.

Chris let Tyler push him back against his bed, back onto those cum-splattered sheets. They both climbed up, still grasping at each other hungrily. Tyler slid onto his back and pulled Chris on top of him. “God, I fucking hate how hot you are,” Chris gasped, and Tyler pulled him closer.

“Prove it,” Tyler growled, sucking and nibbling on his roommate’s neck and ear.

Chris rolled the condom onto his cock, carelessly drizzling lube over himself and onto Tyler’s hole. Tyler was desperate, already panting and hooking his legs over Chris’s own. They were both too drunk and uncoordinated for any of this, but couldn’t stop if they tried. Everything was crashing together. Chris pressed his dick against Tyler’s asshole and the young man groaned, pressing back against him, not caring that it hurt. Chris moved fast, thrusting into Tyler and pressing his shoulders into the bed with an unbelievably firm pressure. Tyler wasn’t one to be bested, though. He grabbed Chris and pulled him down, kissing his neck and then biting it, hard, scraping his teeth against Chris’s skin. “Fuck,” Chris groaned, and Tyler gave a smug little grin and slammed his hips back against Chris’s own.

“Choke me.”

Chris’s hands were around Tyler’s neck in an instant. He squeezed tightly, a thumb on either side of Tyler’s windpipe, watching Tyler’s skin flush and eyes widen. His eyebrows gained this pleading arch, like finally he was giving up control. His mouth was open, breathing shallow and desperate. Chris watched his roommate squirm, one hand coming up to grab onto Chris’s wrist, before he stopped and the air rushed back into Tyler’s lungs.

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